Think of a time when you experienced guilt, shame, failure, or rejection. Whether it was due to another person’s judgment or your own, how did you feel? It felt bad, right?
Situations like these can often make you feel unworthy, embarrassed, angry, and uncomfortable.
These feelings surface as a result of our upbringing and the experiences we had during our childhood and all the way up to adulthood.
Why does this happen?
Our brains process two million bits of information every second. However, our conscious mind can only hold seven chunks of information at a time. We process this through our five senses. The rest of the information is stored in the subconscious minds.
Throughout our early life, the interpretations we make about such situations can get stored in our subconscious minds. Starting from our birth till the age of 12, the positive or negative associations a child develops with the surroundings stick with him or her for the rest of their lives.
For example, think about how you were treated as a child.
- Were you consistently told that you were wrong?
- Were you told that you were dumb and lacked intelligence?
- Did you have to take care of other people involuntarily?
These experiences can impact the way you act as an adult.
However, that doesn’t mean you cannot change your perception of things after a certain age.
The good news is that as an adult, you can still shift how you react.
A great example is when you apply for a job. If you are rejected it can affect your self-esteem. You may beat yourself down thinking there is something wrong with you or you aren’t good enough. When those thoughts emerge, remember that it’s not about you. There are many internal factors that you may not be aware of that could have influenced the decision.
If you were rejected, there is probably something better out there for you (or you were meant to run your own business 😉). Remember that the universe works for you, not against you.
In the moment, everything can feel magnified. Remember that every moment, every situation, every feeling shifts, if you allow it to. The things you have been telling yourself throughout your life don’t necessarily have to be your reality.
We are the co-creators of our reality.
When you are in lower emotions (fear, doubt, anger, worry), it can become difficult to get past that mindset.
“The universe is working with me to create my reality.”
“No failure, only feedback.”
“There’s something better and it’s coming to me.”
It’s ok to wallow for a second but after that, you need to shift your mindset.
The subconscious mind relies on sensory output and doesn’t understand the difference between real and imaginary. It is like a machine, so you are in charge of feeding it the right process.
NLP (neurolinguistic programming), hypnosis, affirmations, and NET (Neuro Emotional Technique) are effective ways to alter your subconscious mind.
In adulthood, strive to address the situations and work on self-improvement. If you don’t, limiting beliefs become a part of world view which, as far as I know, won’t get you where you want to go.